Wisdom--isms

Read the following and you'll see there is not a whole of difference between buddhist thought and farmer wisdom...

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong...

it keep skunks and bankers at a distance.

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

* Every path has a few puddles.

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a Rain Dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

* Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

--

Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight,

he'll just kill you.

Biking in St Charles, Illinois

Our biking group got together for a 20 miler on the Fox River trail from South Elgin to Geneva. The weather was perfect and the trail was mostly blacktop...which translates into an easy ride; except for three gigantic hills here and there! The work out was good because we stopped in St Charles for lunch at a place named Pub 222 right on Main Street. Take a look at the size of the sandwiches they serve up here! I opted for the Chile and didn't need dinner at all later in the day.

Woo Pig Sooie

That is the PIG CALL that razorback fans here in Arkansas do at the games, but for me it is the call for the roasted whole pig that I was fortunate enough to have several times in my life.

Yesterday, we went to an authentic pig roast (this baby was a BIG ONE!) How big was it you ask? Well, the professional cutter was trimming and slicing it for over three hours! I got on line in time to get a few succulent pieces of the tenderloin section....MMMmmmm Good. About half the pig was still on the table and I could not resist snapping off a piece of the crisped skin...we called them cracklins' Missouri...oh man was that good! Then the guy who was slicing handed me a chunk about the size of my hand. Lordy, lordy I know I hurt myself eating it but it was all worth it.

Here is what it looked like early on in the slicing process

Television Advertisements

Ever notice that the advertisements always seem louder than the show you are watching? Here's the reason

Currently, TV ads can't be louder than the loudest peak in a show, said David Perry , the chairman of the broadcast production committee of the American Association of Advertising Agencies in New York . Ads often seem louder to viewers, he added, because a program's volume peak rarely comes just before an ad.

AND, the law may be changing to FINALLY get them to tone it down!

New Computer...Still a bad hair day

So most everybody knows by now that I got a new MacPro laptop computer and so far so good. It does way more stuff than my old one. For example, I was just sitting here with my birdie on my shoulder and went to a thing called photo booth and poof! I got several pictures just like I was in one of those old machines that you would see at the local 5 and 10. Amazing!




It is STILL a bad hair day weeks after the damage was done ;-(

Bad Hair Day

I've been using a national chain to get my hair cut for the last year or so. It's because I travel so much, I am usually not in my familiar home territory when the need arises. Most times it is an at least acceptable job but once in a while...well, it leaves something to be desired.

So I discovered a location even closer to me here in Wauconda than the one I had been using in Lake Zurich so I went there. The sign outside said "No Wait".

It was true, she took me instantly. I like that. I told her to just clean it up a little, shape it but make it about a half inch shorter. Ok, she said. I was a little concerned when she started at the very front on my head; usually they start somewhere at the crown, but hey, I am not in that business. It looked like she took a little too much on the first SNNNIIPPP, but maybe I was mistaken. (Mental note to self: If you are ever worried at the first snip; get up and leave.)

She continued to cut getting a swatch of already cut hair mixed with some that needed cutting and worked her way around. Just the way they all do. I could see it was too short, but that happens sometimes, nothing to get all worked up about. Then she took the electric clipper to get the straggly hairs on the back of my neck (you know, the ones that are practically invisible...yeah, those.) So, I thought she would remove the cape and we would be done, BUT NO.

Then she took the clipper and a comb and randomly combed what little was left of my hair away from my head and zapped it with the clipper. I am mentally wondering now why she wanted everything to be cut evenly, when she is making it look chopped now. This goes on for a bit and I am thinking to myself...maybe I should just go home and buzz cut the whole thing; at least it will all grow out together. FINALLY, it looks like she is done. Yes, she is; she puts the clipper down and steps back from the chair. My heart is sinking.

The manager, who is working at the next chair comes over to look at my cut. She makes a face, grabs the scissors and starts to make it even, working over the entire haircut...it is really short now. She is making faces and clipping away. There is only about 3/4 of an inch left; when will this end. Just a little more and she too, is finished.

I pay and leave. In the car a take a glance at it and I am horrified to see everything is just standing straight up. Why? Because it is too short to fall gently and create a nice layered look. No, it looks like I have just seen a ghost! Well, this is one place I won't go back to, ever.

Oh, you want a picture? Uh..uh. here it is.



I may never remove my biking helmet.

Stuff My Mother Taught Me

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you

Goodbye Dear Friends...

No, not you my faithful readers, this is goodbye to some of my favorite radio folks...Kathy and Judy from WGN talk radio.

It was decided last Friday, by the powers that be, not to renew their contracts. Bingo, just like that...they are gone; no warning...no getting ready to live without them. The management of the station are "making a business decision and going in a different direction". Fine.

They have kept me laughing and thinking for the last 2.5 years and Lord knows how many podcasts from before that. They would talk about the most inane things...just when I was ready to shut them off, they would change the topic, have listeners call in with their opinions or experiences and it would be like a whole new day. The subjects varied from wedding invitations, to death of a family member, workmate etiquette and grade school bullying. Then there was always "sex-Thursday"...where listeners could call in anonymously and discuss some of their early (or late) sexual experiences...these were the best and would often have me close to tears from laughing so hard.

I don't know what is easier, to have this unexpected break or to have known about in advance. It seems like eons ago now, but when I lived in the New York area I would start my day, everyday, with WNEW radio. NOT what you get now which is rock and totally unlistenable stuff, but great jazz from the forties peppered with lots of music that you wouldn't hear anywhere else, new jazz, great artists introduced by "the" Ted Brown and his sidekick Nola Roper. AHHHHH.... Now those were the days. They did comedy skits in the mornings, in-between traffic reports and weather forecasts. No matter how bad things were, these two always made it better. It was a true addiction for me.

When the announcement was made that Ted Brown was retiring, I was devastated. Co-workers were asking me if I was going to handle it. I laughed and said sure, I don't have it as bad as you think. But I was wrong. It was like losing a family member. It took a very long time for me not to miss them in the morning. I would search the Internet hoping that they might appear somewhere else, but no. They were not to be found. Worse, I found out that Ted Brown had moved to Florida and passed away some years later. There is still a dark hole somewhere in my heart for him.

So goodbye dear friends, you are missed and loved very much.